Quicksand

I love metaphors. Honestly. There really isn't a day that goes by that I don't find a metaphor about something in my world that feels applicable to my own thoughts and processes. This metaphor was in some reading material I was given. I liked it.

When we’re stuck in quicksand, the immediate impulse is to struggle and fight to get out.  But that’s exactly what you mustn’t do in quicksand – because as you put weight down on one part of your body (your foot), it goes deeper.  So the more you struggle, the deeper you sink – and the more you struggle.  Very much a no-win situation.  With quicksand, there’s only one option for survival.  Spread the weight of your body over a large surface area – lay down.  It goes against all our instincts to lay down and really be with the quicksand, but that’s exactly what we have to do.  So it is with distress.  We struggle and fight against it, but we’ve perhaps never considered just letting it be, and being with the distressing thoughts and feelings, but if we did, we’d find that we get through it and survive – more effectively than if we’d fought and struggled.  

I can completely see how this is applicable. The book talks about how life is full of pain, but it doesn't have to be full of suffering. 

The whole time I'm reading this book and the concept of acceptance, the thought that kept passing through my head was what is quite possibly the only serious quote in Princess Bride:

"Life is pain highness. Anyone who says differently is selling something."

Isn't that true? Aren't there forces all around us constantly trying to sell us this idea that we deserve to not be in pain? That a life void of discomfort of any kind is indicative of a successful life?  

Its a simple line, but the salesmen (who is usually crafty and convincing because he's, well, he's the devil and that's his forte) is pretty darn good. We believe his story without really giving it a second thought. Mostly because we want to believe it. No one wants to hurt. Its actually instinctual to avoid things that our guts tell us will make us uncomfortable. We have found clever ways to try and stop feeling bad. And the salesman who sold us the story that pain is not part of a happy and productive life, also seems to have the cure. 

Isn't that convenient. 

I know how he works, because he's sold me the same elixir. I've seen him sell it to friends. And he's so good, that he mixes that elixir and adds the exact flavor he knows we want. Its an easy sell. 

"You don't deserve to feel sad that you're single and alone. Have a piece of cake. Or two. Possibly three."

This was one from a friend; "You should never feel insecure or inadequate. You should have a drink. Maybe two. Maybe the whole bottle. That should make you feel better."

There's a thousand other flavors; righteous indignation, revenge, pornography...just name any addiction or compulsive behavior and you have the perfect recipe for emotional and spiritual quicksand. 

I'm trying to learn more about this concept of accepting pain as part of life. I will learn to lay down in the quicksand. I will stop struggling. I will stop suffering.

As I make progress, I'll let you know.