Say what?

My girls have this problem. They mishear and mis-say things.
Some people reading this may not actually believe me. They are, after all, clever girls who have a great vocabulary and are pretty darn smart for their ages.
Which sometimes makes it funnier.
Allow me to present a comedy of errors...a comedy that will henceforth be known as "Say what?!"
Starring the amazing and talented Maryn and Ashlyn.

Scene 1:
The Camerons are attending the ward spring social, a breakfast somewhat early on a Saturday morning. Fade in. Mother is carrying on a simple adult conversation with other adults, their neighbors.

Mother (to neighbor): Why don't you plan on joining us for dinner. I'm making chicken and dumplings.

Ashlyn: What!?!? You're making chicken and DUCKLINGS?

Scene 2:
In the hallway after the social, Mother and Maryn are talking informally.

Mother: Maryn, can you think of anything we could do this afternoon when we have all those little girls over to play? Something to keep them busy?

Maryn: I think they'll kind of keep themselves busy.

Mother: We could make cookies I guess.

Ashlyn (who has just now entered in on the conversation because she was walking past): Why are you making TURKEYS?

(I dunno. Maybe to go with the chicken and ducklings?)

Scene 3:
A short time ago, the morning after Marcus has come for an evening visit wherein he enjoyed some tom-foolery with the children.

Paul: That was a great conversation last night. My favorite part was when Marcus (Ashlyn enters the room here) said that McDonald's causes cancer.

Ashlyn: What?! Marcus causes cancer?!

Scene 4:
Mother and Maryn are chatting in the car. Actually, Maryn is chatting somewhat incessantly and mother is both pretending to listen intently and trying to sort it out the gist of what is being said.

Maryn: (Cue talking without breathing)... So we were talking about some stuff on science and we read this part about cannibal mice and carnival mice... (keeps talking without breathing)

Mother: (Interrupting) Wait...what? Carnival mice?

Maryn; (Pausing to breath) Oh. Actually, I think I meant carnivore, not carnival.

Scene 5:
The house is filled with guests for dinner. One of the guests approaches mother and asks if they might be able to use the restroom. Mother genially points the way.

Mother: I really hope it clean enough...

Maryn: Don't worry. I'm pretty sure its edible...

Snapshots

• While running errands in Provo, Ashlyn and I stopped by my office to grab a few things I needed. As I set the alarm and hurried her out of the building she asked "Why do we have to go so fast?" I replied "We have to get through the second door in 30 seconds before the alarm turns on. If we don't, the alarm will go off." Ashlyn; "And then what would happen? Would your boss have to come down and fix it?" Me:"Yeah. And I'd be in BIG trouble." Ashlyn: "Oh." She pauses thoughtfully. "So what would he do? Give you extra chores?" :)
• Me: "Ashlyn, why did you change your pants?"
  Ashlyn: "Because my skinny jeans were making my butt hurt."
  Mmmm...Kay.
• Last night in the car Maryn was whining, and complaining, about something...again...perpetually. It wasn't long until I heard myself speaking these words out loud to her; "Dear Maryn. Please stop it. Love, Mom." Maryn promptly replies "Dear Mom. There's nothing you can do about it. I'm twelve and hormonal. Love, Maryn."
• I was dishing Ashlyn out some soup into a dish he had retrieved herself. As I scooped she informed me she had grabbed the bowl from the cabinet beneath where she had been sitting on the counter...using her toes. I both impressed at her dexterity and grossed out at the same time.

• Paul points this out at the restaurant we stopped at. "Look. That's what I'm going to do when I grow up." Maryn: " I think I'm going to throw up." Paul: "Ah come on. You know you think their good looking." Maryn: "No! They're hair is long and their chests are hairy. Gross." Paul: "Sure. But at least their not picky." My kids crack me up.

The "G" word

So last week, my mom and my girls were sitting around talking about words they shouldn't say. Most of them they had heard at school...for Maryn more than she would ever like to hear. They covered the big ones, then Maryn commented on how they should really never say the "G" word. (In our house, we do not say the word "God" as an expletive). 

Ashlyn, not really knowing what Maryn means, pipes up "The 'G' word? Is that 'government'?"